Running uphill

The epic trail run. Yeah, it was epic and it was awesome. I've been getting more and more mileage up in the woods the last few weeks. Because it's essential to the three main races this year, since they're all on trails. But not only that, it is a really fantastic way of motivating one self to run when you're pretty bored of the usual routes around the river and the town. It gives the extra dimension of exploration and the surface breaks up the monotone rhythm of pounding pavement. 


On monday I did a 21 K run up my usual ascent up Blåstein and up to a cabin at 400 meters, but I kept going north further into the forest. It has been ages since I went that far and I really can't understand why I haven't been up there for so long. It's pretty rough and technical after 6-7 K's and some evidence of winter is still left it was a great experience to get up to Skimten plateau at 550 meters where I went often as a kid. I had hell of a way back home as I went a different route I wasn't familiar with. It was exciting as it was tiring when I spent some energy just to get my bearings straight. In the end I got back on track and got down very tired and very happy.

I couldn't get up again for 2 hours after this photo. The
worst thing is that the remote is juuust out of my reach.

This time I was supposed to go for 25 Kilometers and thought that I better take an easier route up to the woods, since I usually start to climb up 200 meters the first two K's after getting out the  door and that's a pretty hard warm-up. So I went for a about two K's on flat pavement before I swung up the hill. Even though I started easy, my legs felt heavy and I got winded pretty fast. So much for taking an easier route. 


And it got worse. 


The Mistake of Going Off the Track, example I.
I planned to go up a ski slope, but instead I went up along a gorge. Surprisingly it went well for the first few hills, even with natures trip wire, roots, laid up along the foot paths. But suddenly I veered out off the main path and out to a bedrock trail. It was overflowing with water from some recent snow melt, I assumed, and I also assumed it was a switchback trail so I kept going. But it was getting very western and instead of backtracking I cut off the trail and went straight into the thick shrub. It was a mistake since it was no paths and just dense lichen. I had to walk because I could feel myself reaching the lactose threshold. 


After a lot of cursing I got back to the foot path up the gorge, and my God it was breath taking watching the roaring stream 60 meters straight down.

My legs were too shaky to get to edge and it's
a nice and fatal drop for my iPhone down there.

I realized I packed too little for this run, because I was really lightheaded and my legs were low on energy on this first climb and I had only brought my hand held water bottle and three servings of energy gel. I sucked down one and hoped that would help some. The trails leveled out some and it went pretty well, stopping only at signposts and once to fill up the water bottle at a stream.  

Gamledammen, top of the climb. Unfortunately the sun bathing bikini  models'
agent made sure I couldn't get a wider angled photo.

I eventually got to more familiar territory and got up to the big lodge Tverken where I decided again to not follow the plan - I wanted up to the Skimten Plateau again, even after knowing it had snowed last night. So, after a quick and not at all thorough study of a mapboard, I raced up the really wet and rocky climb. I was hitting snow a lot sooner than the last time.

Some snow

 ..and

more snow, oh, and don't run on those logs, slippery
m***********s..

..and

******

..and of course

"It's May, goddammit!"

But getting over crusty snow isn't the worst, because after a slight climb and I got to the lovely bog plateau. It's fun and challenging to cross a big wet bog, but it was getting really cold and after awhile it kind of got painful to dip your feet in freezing water when you thought you found a solid piece of earth.

It's wet and it's cold. 

Of course I slipped and went knee-deep in.

Eventually I got through the worst and reached Skimtheia, the highest point of the area and a nice place to have a breather and suck down some more gel and water. I remember biking up here as a kid and I could see alot of bicycle tracks through the bogs, I just can't imagine how it has to feel like to crash and nosedive into the cold water. Though I guess the people biking here have a whole more hand-eye coordination than me. 

Skimtvarden. 

Feeling artistic.

The descent down to Eiksætra was slow and wet and cold, and fun of course. For every meter down in elevation I spent like five sideways trying to not run into more cold water. 

splash!

After a while I got down to Eiksætra which is a big tourist cabin near a lake, with several small cabins scattered around. It felt good to run on a big dirt road again, but I was going to make it a lot more difficult for myself, again. 


The Mistake of Going Off the Track, example II.
I had stopped at a mapboard for a few minutes planning my route back south and decided to follow the dirt road west before going south at a stream. Maybe I was tired, but I left the road too soon up a small track and hit south way too early on something that I thought was a stream, but turned out to be snowmelt on trail.

You can't even see the water trickling down.

So I started on a heavy ascent up to the platou again, off any paths and on a southerly bearing. It was pretty brutal and I decided to never to jump off a trail again. When I finally reached the top of the climb I knew I had chewed off a lot more then what I had bargained for. It was just lichen, marshes and lakes - in other words, wet and cold. I had to avoid the lakes and try for the small knolls. I think I spent an hour just crisscrossing this landscape getting more and more frustrated every time I dipped my toes in. It was getting painful every time splashed into the cold water and I was starting to get really tired. After taking my chances with just going southwest to what seemed like ridge I finally broke out into a narrow, but marked path. I went down along a 50 meter deep drop to one side and dense forest on the other. 

You can almost see Drammen there. S**t, just halfway home.

I stopped and took some photos(something I need to stop doing since it really slows me down.) when I realized that the faint cluster of buildings way down there were in fact Drammen. At least I was going in the right direction, but damn, that's far away. I followed the winding path further south until it abruptly ended up in a hellish scree covered in slippery moss. I didn't dare to take a picture of the wild descent.

I finally found my way to familiar terrain and it really was just downhill from there. My legs were pretty beaten and sore after a few hours too many in the cold bogs, so it wasn't a killer pace. I finally broke through the forest on shuffling feet and stopped in a supermarket gulping down some chocolate milk and some chocolate bars before dragging myself into the shower. All in all a great long run and some nice adventures. Lesson to next time, woolen socks is a must.  

FEAR AND SLOWTHING IN ENSCHEDE.

FEAR AND SLOWTHING IN ENSHEDE.

By Bar Runner Phil "the Instigator" Morris. 

Originally posted in the Bar Runner Facebook Group

 

Enschede Half Marathon 2012.

(Enchede is pronounced en-skeer-day a bit like 'I love you' in Norwegian.)

As previously stated my last run was a source of contempt and self loathing for me so I decided to do things right and prepare properly. As there were only 2 weeks since the last one where I had calf issues I had only trained once which was planned as 10 mins slow out and return fast but turned out to 7 mins out and then I just turned around and ran home as my leg was hurting and I didn't want to injure it (any more). So there was an element of logic to me not training beforehand however topsy turvy that logic may of been..

So, no drinking alcohol on Friday or Saturday and I had pasta for dinner both nights I made a point of drinking one or two sports drinks on the days beforehand to keep my hydration levels up.

The "sports drink" in question. Picture from Great Britain Olympic Marathon Team.

I have to say, for me at least, maintaing a good preparation plan was mentally very fullfilling, I felt great Sunday morning and was raring to go, confident in the knowledge a decent (for me) time was on the cards. I would of accepted anywhere between 1.58 to 2.03 as acceptably ok.

Sunday morning I had a few bananna's for breakfast - dunno why.. I heard somewhere they're good...something to do with pottasium I believe - and a sports drink and headed off to the event arriving....ONE HOUR EARLY!!!

Yea....I felt like a winner alredy ;) LOL!

As it was a bit chilly I jogged around warming up. Not smoking.

The sun came out just as we were forming up on the start, which I again took as good karma for the run ahead. Confidence was high.

I found the 1hr 55 pacer dude with his orange coloured ballons and away we went.

The first few k I was leaving the pacer behind and thought to myself Woa phil boy - easy tiger and slowed myself to maintain his pace.

At 5k the cramps in my calf started, I tried to block it out but it was really pissing me off more than hurting me to be honest I've never had injury problems.

At 7k the 1.55 dude passed me (and that was the last I saw of him LOL...).

At 8k I stopped and stretched my calf which pissed me off to as it's been years since I stopped or walked one step of a run.

The stretching did seem to help for a k or 2.

At 10k the 2.00 pacer passed me.

I felt like giving up I knew I was in for a shit time. But me not being in the business of quitting compounded by not wanting to give away any unnecessary joy to the haters I carried on.

I was running a few k stopping stretching and so on at this stage.

It started raining which soon turned to hail (?) but both lasted a couple of minutes only. No problem there I actually like running in the rain.

12k to 16k went ok really I guess, I was stopping and walking say 20 metre's or so every now and then.

I will say one thing I noticed and please read it all before you jump to any conclusions...

There are some real spazzy gymp type mother fuckers who run these here half marathons...I know, half the fuckers were overtaking me. 

Honestly there were people running with arms and legs flailing all over the place, one dude was flopping around so much I considered wrestling him to the ground and pinning his tounge to his lip so he didn't swallow the feckin thing...I thought he was having some kind of seizure!!

Google search of "gymp" resulted in this.

But, to be honest I salute these people more than natural athlete's for getting out there and doing it. And what could I say...I was a gympy mother fucker too, getting beaten by other gymps!

Another thing I'll say was the level of inspiration from these people was top notch too. A few times I'd stop and someone would say 'come on mate' (in dutch...and one dude in german) which always gave me the motivation to carry on. I did it to others too. I ran with maybe half a dozen men or women at different times gee-ing each other on till they left me or I left them. It was nice I gotta say.

At 17k the 2.05 pacer passed me and I thought right you gympy mother fucker, it's just pain, deal with it and stick with the 2.05 and you can still get an improved time then before.

It wasn't to be. Mental toughness was lacking I guess. From here on out I basically ran a k walked 50m and so on.

So I crossed the line at 2. (fucking) 15. Shit.

I had noticed on my last run my breathing was super easy and had put that down to not smoking on the startline, It was super easy here too. I came to the conclusion I'm running so slow that my heart rate is only slightly above normal therefore I didn't need to breathe hard!!

I blame was new trainers, as mentioned earlier. I'm going to replace them and try again on the 20th May in a cross country half marathon.

They may have cramped up his calves, but damn he looked fabulous!

To end on a positive note I would say to my Barruning amigo's what I learnt on this run is having a pre planned and perfectly exectuted preparation agenda is mentally very rewarding, as someone who took race day as any other day I found proper preparation extremely rewarding.

Taste of the Trail

After a week or two of gradually testing the foot on slow 10Ks on asphalt without any flare-ups it was time to get back on the program. I'm planning to start it in a couple of weeks so I better get in shape. I did a nice hill workout last week, 2 minutes x 6 and felt confident to hit the trails up the valley side.

I probably should have walked the first bit, 300 meters of elevation on the first 2-3 Ks is a pretty brutal warm up, and I hadn't reached the forest yet. When I reached the trail I was pretty winded, when I negotiated the first rocky hill I was pretty tired.* I walked up some of the worst inclines and tried to jog up the rest. Of course, the infamous Blåsteinsbakkene being just a series of insane inclines, I walked quite alot.

The one thing about trailrunning I've forgotten or taken lightly was the fact that you have to pay attention to where you're placing your foot. When it comes to road running the worst thing that happens is treading on dogshit (or horseshit, when you're running in Nedre Eiker), but the trail is strewn with natures evil little booby-traps, i.e. rocks and roots. When I almost stumbled for the third time I had to stop daydreaming about hooking up with Megan Fox around the corner and focus on the ground. Tripping on a rock was slightly more realistic than finding her jogging around here. Just slightly.

I finally reached a cabin at the 5,5 K mark according to the Garmin so I had some water, a breather and a long shiver. Even if it's spring, I was caught out with shorts and a technical shirt at 400 meters. It started to snow. Both my nipples pointed me home.

Now started what must be the high point of trail running, the downhills. Of course by fun, I mean "the exhilarating feeling of fear of smashing your face on pointy rocks because you can't f***ing stop". And in some places I skedaddled down sheet ice and crusty snow, which was equally fun/terrifying. When I hit the road again, my knees and thighs were quivering with exhaustion/fear. I think I've found a new addiction. All the stats here.

On another happy note, Bar Runner Team Member Keiko has put on his running shoes. According to rumors, it was rather reluctant and forced, but his efforts has been duly noted. Hopefully this will last longer than his attempted solo career as MC Cool Ice.

Stress Fracture Is a Pain In The Ass

So, yeah, it's been awhile since I ran a meaningful distance without feeling like I've stepped on a nail. I've managed to either stress a bone with too many deadlines and too high expectations, or it has cracked a bit because of too many miles, too soon. It really sucks since I've gotten to a nice weekly total by this point and the spring has finally arrived leaving the trails inviting and safe - the aggressive skiers have packed in and brought forth their rolling death machines menacing the pavements instead.

I guess I've realized why the 10% rule is mentioned in every long distance running training program there is. Of course, I will not heed such warnings before it's to late. And even though my weekly mileage weren't way off the 10%-increments-per-week rule, I probably did cram too many kilometers in the weekends because I didn't manage to get enough runs during rather hectic weekdays. Instead of spreading them out with more walking in between, I've became too eager and went full out on some pretty long runs. Oh, well, now I know.

So what do I do instead?

I have to keep up if I'm going to reach my goals alive. I mean, it is only six months left, and I can't afford any more easy weeks. Being slow and generally dimwitted I went out for a run only a week after the injury, since it felt ok and I didn't think it was a fracture. Thankfully I brought some spare change for some reason(I usually don't, for the same reason) and when it felt like I had stepped on an icepick again I was only a limping distance to the 06 Bus to Humiliation.

Now, the snow and ice is melting and it safe to venture out on the roads, and the temperature is getting more pleasant so it's time to get my 'rusty old bike out(the T has ironically rusted away during the winter, the break on the back wheel is shot, so it's a bike can't trust anymore; hence 'rusty. Clever, eh?) and get some nice biking session on. Except it's been awhile since I've biked. Yeah, you never forget how to do it and all that. It's just a certain part of me got a little sore. Yeah, that shameful part.

I bike everyday to the train station for my commute, so it's a means of transportation - it's something I do to get from A to B. Just biking for the sake of biking is something I've rarely done. I can see that some people think the same way about running, but come on! Running is fun.

Now I try to bike around as long as I would run, but I when I finish the usual routes at a quarter of the time I would have run it, I get bored and it is a struggle to keep going further. I guess I'm never going to become a triathlete any time soon.

Well, I really don't have any snappy ending to this, or even a point, I think. So the totally improvised morale of this is don't be stupid, but be smart. One step at a time. Know your limits. My butt hurts because my foot hurts. And so on.

Hopefully I'll get back on track sometime during this week. I'll take it easy and slow. And pay attention to the 10%-rule, goddammit!

Bar Runner Team Signs Thomas "Keiko" Wilthil

24.02.2012 Bar Runner Head Quarters, Drammen, Norway

Today the Bar Runner Team announced that they had signed the Strawweight Barfly Thomas "Keiko" Wilthil, who is famous for the infamous Thomas Talking pop-duo, drinking St. Brendan's Irish Cream Liqueur without being ashamed of it and being deceptivly fat.

-He will be an addition to the team, says the Bar Runner President without revealing too much of the reason for the signing.

Thomas Wilthil is world famous for many things in Drammen, especially Øren, but has no experience in long distance running. The former boy band super star has finished a 10 K run in Oslo in 2011 with the impressive time of 53:14, for which he came in second in his Diet Soda Dependent-class.

- A rising zeppelin, the Light Soda Appreciation Society Norwegian Branch called him after awarding him with the Pepsi Max Athlete of Year prize for this achievment. The winner was disqualified after testing positive on water. He was later banned form LSASNB.

There has been a lot of speculation of what he would do next and according to a secret source he has been offered a six-pack of vintage Tab Extra as a signing-on bonus.

- I have no comment, the Bar Runner President said when confronted with this.

Other experts has pointed out that this is an effort from Mr. Wilthil's PR-team to rebrand him after the "The Highland Fairy"-incident that left him disgraced and led to the dissolution of Thomas Talking. His short lived solo career as The Lord of the Highland Dance was a critical and financial failure after it was known that he still drank Saint Brendan Irish Cream Liqueur. The Higland Dance Associaton revoked his scottishness licence and he had to cancel his UK-tour.

- Nooo, ah willnae comment on the St. Brendan-drinking, ah've apologized and mooved on, the half Scottish Wilthil said earlier when asked about it.

- I'm positive he wont be doing that kind of stuff anymore, he made a promise and that's all I need. He was a kid and made a mistake over 10 years ago. Let's move on please, said the Bar Runner President.

He'll be hoping to focus the White Owl for Helteløpet in september. It is expected that Bar Runner will sign up more runners for the event, to be announced shortly. But the main goal will be to avoid any scandals that can affect the team, with the addition of Børresens Biggest Wuss.

- I can't believe how a press conference of only one person can turn this hostile, said The Bar Runner President and stormed out.

- un[expletive]believable!

Kongsberg - Drammen

I decided to run home from a political convention last weekend. People would call me crazy, stupid or liberal, but apart from not understanding why anybody would endure a whole weekend of political, well, stuff(I'm not sure if we actually accomplished anything worthwhile), I got some surprised reactions. It really isn't as far as what people think, and my god, after being inside a stuffed conference room the the entire weekend running 38 K is a welcome relief.

But it was a great run and I couldn't help myself smiling at times.

The start wasn't all that great though, I felt heavy and slow in the climb out of Kongsberg, but it passed after a few K's when I was more preoccupied with the icy roads on the descents. I should probably have worn the trail shoes instead of the road ones. Or microspikes. Or waited until spring.

I really started to enjoy myself when the terrain levelled out and I could see the snowcapped mountains far away. I lucked out with the weather as well, especially with the sunset that painted everything in a bright pink. The Eikern lake was a treat and the area looked like a terrific hiking/fishing area. I guess I got an new place to explore this summer.

The temperature was good, though I could really feel the change when I ran in to some woods while the sun dipped beneath the horizone. Though I had been smart and packed a soft shell for that, I hadn't packed smart - a banana had desintegrated and left a mess in the back pack. I smelled of ripe banana the rest of the way. Thankfully I didn't get molested by hungry and vicious monkeys who are known to roam theese parts.

I had planned a slightly shorter route, but when the darkness fell and me being self-aware enough to not trust my direction finding skills I played it safe and followed the roads straight north to Hokksund. Where I kind of got lost so I had to ask some of the locals as to where the shortest way to Drammen was. I think he thought I was some snobby asshole or something, because it wasn't the straightest route, but I wasn't about to argue with someone in this notorious lawless hellhole so I kept pressing on along the river.

The rest of way home was rather uneventful, I scared the bejesus of a known eccentric of Mjøndalen just by running past him and I managed to splash through a puddle that had disguised itself as an ice sheet. But apart from feeling a bit tired and sore I maintained a decent pace almost all the way to my doorstep.



In the end I ran 38,21 kilometres in 4:26 with an average moving pace of 6:47 min/km. It seems crazy, and guess people try to expose the irrationality of this by asking the simple "why?", but I counter with the really cheesy and sooo Nike slogan-ish "Because I can," then I turn around and limp away majestically [cue dramatic music and fade out].

Week 2 review

Run Distance: 20.65 km
Run Time: 2:06:54 min
Meters gained: 162
Meters lost: 163

2 runs logged

Well, not an ideal week, though it is difficult to log my runs from the soccer training when the the runtastic app doesn't work and it is difficult to get a exact distance and time when you do intervals. I guess I did four or five on tuesday on a 30 min. interval session with God knows how many during playing. Though I did run for almost an hour then. On a synthetic pitch. Which, for the second time in a row, didn't go well for my lower calf. This time it was my left achilles.

I had to take Wednesday off because of that and taped my leg for thursday when I lead two groups of the soccer kids to some stair running, I did two 30 min session taking it easy with first group since I didn't want to aggravate the leg. I did get carried away with the second group and ended up doing a few sprint duels with them. It was fun, but I really felt my hamstrings on friday so I struggled through a sluggish 10K. They felt thight and I generally felt wooden and slow.

Today I skied about 6 K's which was quite an effort because of poor technique and not being used to skiing. A great exercise and I'll feel my shoulders and triceps tomorrow. After that I spent most the soccer training using the vocal chords with only a few minutes joining the kids on the warming up and cooling down.

Then I had a meeting in the city centre and thought I'd squeeze in a run. I ran the same route as friday, but this time I was flying. But after the meeting my lower calf felt raw and fearing a strain I walked most of the 2 K's back.

Hopefully I'll get more mileage next week, I'm aiming for a 60K week and hopefully I'll get some good long runs on Wednesday, Saturday and Sunday. perhaps 15, 15 and 20, because I think I'll get 10 K's in the training on Tuesday and Thursday.